If you are
self confident, you are an optimist. Optimists
surround themselves with positive people, face their fears and deal with
them. Pessimism is a mental attitude.
Pessimists anticipate undesirable outcomes from a given situation which is
generally referred to as situational pessimism or believes that undesirable
things are going to happen to them in life more than desirable ones.
On the other
hand, an Optimist is a person who tends to be hopeful and confident about the
future or the success of something.
BASIC DIFFERENCES:
“There are
three basic differences in the reactions of optimists and pessimists. The first
difference is that the optimist sees a setback as temporary, while the
pessimist sees it as permanent. The optimist sees an unfortunate event as
temporary, something that is limited in time and that has no real impact on the
future. The pessimist, on the other hand, sees negative events as permanent, as
part of life and destiny.
“The second
difference between the optimist and the pessimist is that the optimist sees
difficulties as specific, while the pessimist sees them as pervasive. This
means that when things go wrong for the optimist, he looks at the event as an
isolated incident, totally disconnected from other things that are going on in
his daily life.
“The third
difference between optimists and pessimists is that optimists see events as
external, while pessimists interpret events as personal. When things go wrong,
the optimist will tend to see the setback as resulting from external factors
over which one has little control.
“If the
optimist is cut off in traffic, for example, instead of getting angry or upset,
he will simply downgrade the importance of the event. The pessimist on the other hand, has a
tendency to take everything personally. If the pessimist is cut off in traffic,
he will react as though the other driver has deliberately acted to upset and
frustrate him, or the devil is at it again.
“The height
of the fully mature, self-actualizing personality is the ability to be
objective and unemotional when caught up in the inevitable storms of daily
life. The superior person has the ability to continue talking to himself in a
positive and optimistic way, keeping his mind calm, clear and completely under
control. The mature personality is well coordinated, more relaxed, aware and
capable of interpreting events more realistically and less emotionally than is
the immature personality. As a result, the mature person exerts a far greater
sense of control and influence over his environment, and is far less likely to
be angry, upset, or distracted.
“Look on the
inevitable daily setbacks that you face as being temporary, specific and
external. View the negative situation as a single event that is not connected
to other events and that is caused largely by external factors, which most at
times you dont have control over it. Simply refuse to see the event as being in
any way permanent, pervasive or indicative of personal incompetence of
inability. Resolve to think like an
optimist, no matter what happens. You may not be able to control events but you
can control the way you react to them.
TAKING CONTROL
You can
change your perspective in these simple ways:
“First,
remind yourself continually that setbacks are only temporary, they will soon be
past and nothing is as serious as you think it is.
“Second,
look upon each problem as a specific event, not connected to other events and
not indicative of a pattern of any kind. Deal with it and get on with your
life.
“Third,
recognize that when things go wrong, they are usually caused by a variety of
external factors. Say to yourself, ‘What can’t be cured must be endured,’ and
then get back to thinking about your goals.”
